Dear Charles, Prince of Wales

Prince Charles, longtime enemy of anything that threatens to make him work for a living, has decided to state his categorical opposition to the Enlightenment. Rather than simply live out his days as the useless appendage of a withered monarchy (i.e. parasite), he has taken it upon himself (and his narrow, aristocratic shoulders) to save the world from reason. The enlightenment, remember, was the movement to see what reason and logic had to say before making dumb decisions. Rather than cry to the empty heavens for advice, people decided to figure things out with their brainmeat in some systematic fashion.


No more, cries Prince Charles, at a conference on green building methods.


“We cannot go on surely like this, just imagining that the principles of the Enlightenment laid down in the eighteenth century still apply now.  I don’t believe they do. But if you challenge people who hold the Enlightenment as the ultimate answer to everything, you do really upset them.” 

Two things:

1. 1) These people might be upset because you are one step away from advocating a return to scrying and augury as a means to solve problems, and
2. 2) If this is not what you mean, and you came to these decisions via some kind of ordered thought process, YOU ARE USING THE TOOLS OF THE ENLIGHTMENT.  It's like saying "Now that my infection has been successfully treated, I can devote my full attention to banning antibiotics.

Overheard at the cafe

So, Josh texted me a snippet of a conversation he overheard at CC's Coffee House this morning between a guy and a girl who were sitting at the table next to him.

Girl: I mean, I don't want a job, but I kinda do, you know?
Guy: I know...I mean, I've worked a couple of times
Girl: So, are you like, into tanning?
Guy: ... not like into it, into it...I mean I tan, but just enough to get a good color, you know?

Wowsers.

Truly he is always with you.

In a world where tragedy hides in the shadows like a drunk ninja, mumbling to itself and believing you can't see it...there are sources of comfort. Regardless of your particular religion (or black-hearted lack of any belief), I hope you know that Jesus is always with you, watching over you. Especially while you bathe.





Many, many more await you at sortakinda.com.

Happy Birthday Josh!

Unfortunately on Sunday, Josh celebrated his 37th year on this earth with aches and pains, fatigue and a cruddy, drippy, coughy (and not the good kind of coffee) sore throat. We tried to make the best of it by stocking up on cold medicines, hot tea and cold and flu relief bath salts with tea tree and eucalyptus.

On Saturday, I took Josh to dinner at Marcello's Wine Market and Cafe, which is one of our favorite restaurants. He soldiered through and we had a great time. The meal and service were awesome.

On Sunday, we ventured out again to have birthday breakfast. I gave Josh two new McSweeny's t-shirts to start the day as part one of his birthday present.

We attempted to seize the day and have fun, but we didn't last long. At about 3 p.m. we began to fade, so we took a birthday nap instead. Well, I took a nap on the couch and Josh said he was going to lay down in bed and read, but I suspect he dozed off too.

When I woke up, I made a delicious chicken noodle soup and a birthday cake. Earlier in the day when I asked Josh about his favorite cake he said it was either chocolate cake with no icing or the sheet cake from elementary school with a simple glaze frosting. So I attempted to make my own version of that with my trusted Betty Crocker Butter Recipe Chocolate Cake mix and a half batch of the frosting minus pecans from The Pioneer Woman's Classic Chocolate Sheet Cake. The results weren't half bad.

After our soup and cake, I gave Josh the second part of his birthday present ... and this is the exciting part -- 100 square feet of antique brick pavers for the floor of our sunroom/library. More on that project to come.

Josh went to the doctor today and was diagnosed with a sinus infection. He got a cortisone shot, antibiotics and a nasal spray. So he should be feeling much better pretty soon, but if you ask me I'll attribute it to the special healing powers of my chicken soup.

The following is my recipe for a happy birthday even when you have a sinus infection.

Easy Chicken Soup
1 large yellow onion chopped
2 cloves crushed garlic
1 tablespoon butter
1 tablespoon olive oil
2 celery stalks, halved lengthwise and chopped
1.5 - 2 cups shredded carrots (or chopped whole or baby or frozen whatever you like)
1 box chicken stock
1 bay leaf
assorted other fresh herbs (such as thyme) to taste (I used a couple dashes of italian and montreal grilled chicken seasoning because it's what I had)
~4 cups water
2 lbs boneless skinless chicken breast chopped in to large chunks
1/2 cup orzo (or other small pasta)
fresh lemon juice
salt and pepper
tony chachere's seasoning

Chop and saute onion with crushed garlic in the butter and olive oil. When the onion is wilted and clear, add celery, carrots, broth, water and bay and herbs/seasoning. Bring to a boil. Wash and chop chicken in large chucks (so it will cook faster) season with salt and pepper and/or a little tony's. Add chicken to boiling stock, lower heat to strong simmer, cover and cook until chicken is done. Remove chicken to bowl and shred into small pieces with a fork. Return chicken to soup, return to boil and add pasta. When pasta is cooked al dente add a squeeze of fresh lemon juice and adjust seasoning to taste. Cover and simmer til ready to serve. Enjoy.

Butter Recipe Chocolate Cake with Elementary School Throw-back Frosting

Betty Crocker Butter Recipe Chocolate Cake
Prepare cake mix according to package directions. Pour batter into greased 9x13 inch pan, bake according to package.

Throw-back Frosting
1 stick of butter
3 tablespoons cocoa powder
3 tablespoons milk
1/2 tsp vanilla
Powdered sugar (see below for amount)

Melt one stick of butter in a saucepan, add 2-3 tablespoons cocoa powder. Stir until dissolved. Add 3 tablespoons milk and 1/2 tsp vanilla extract. Stir or whisk. Add some powdered sugar (I wasn't very precise). I had an open 1lb bag of powdered sugar and I dumped less than half of that in the sauce pan - I have no idea of the measurement - so I'm going to say less than half of a one pound bag of powdered sugar. Stir to combine the chocolate and sugar, use a whisk to remove lumps. Remove from heat, keep warm - or rewarm and whisk before frosting the cake. Pour over warm chocolate cake and spread to coat the top. Serve with a glass of ice cold milk and in this case, a candle. Deelish!

Is that a cane you are madly brandishing, or are you...no wait, it's clearly a cane.

Dear MadWoman raving at vehicles from your motorized wheelchair while rolling/driving the wrong way down one of our city's most heavily trafficked four-laners,

Are you actually that angry at every other thing on the road (i.e. things that are supposed to be there)? Does brandishing that cane at us seem, in your rage-muddled brain, an appropriate response to whatever is bothering you?

I have decided to chalk it up to contraindicating "medicines." Cocaine is a medicine, right? What about Drano? The wet stuff in Swiffer Sheets? I am pretty sure Deep-Woods off is ok to huff, as long you chase it with 40 ounces of room temperature St. Ides. Chemistry is hard.

Cordially, which is to say, Godspeed, You Glorious Lunatic! Teach Deep Woods Off a lesson!

concerned driver #12

Okay, so maybe all five posts within a week was a bit ambitious

Well, Internet, it appears that I have failed you once again.

Rest assured my pretties, there will be posts. I promise.

We have been so busy lately making lots of exciting progress on our list of home improvements. I'm planning a photo shoot of all these exciting changes this very evening.

Stay tuned!

Q: What's worse than being a procrastinator?

A: Also being a perfectionist!

If procrastination and perfectionism sound mutually exclusive to you, think again. Think a procrastinating perfectionist sounds like an oxymoron? Well, allow me to introduce myself. I am Rene' Repp, Esq. putting off perfection 'til tomorrow.

Let's explore the evidence. I have written a total of eight posts for this blog. I know, you may be asking, "Wait, Rene', I'm counting and I only see three measly posts by you; what gives?"

Well, it's true. I've only posted on Harky Tarky three times, but I have five additional posts saved as drafts.

I know, it's a sad and pathetic existence I lead.

So, here's how is happens. I write for a living. It's my job. Five days a week, I wake up and drive for an hour to a job where I read reports and attend meetings about policy, legislation, programs, reform, processes and government. Then I have to translate that into news releases and talking points, Web site content and PowerPoint presentations. These things will be issued to the media, delivered at press conferences, presented before the legislature. They must be clear, concise, simple, accurate.

We start with the cold hard facts; we lead with the most newsworthy information; we assume you won't read to the end. The kind of writing I do is technical, not so much humorous or interesting, per se.

So when I get an idea for a blog post, I get excited and I think here's my chance. I can write about this funny or interesting thing. Maybe people will love it, maybe they'll read it and then they will chuckle. Oh, how they'll chuckle!

Then I start writing, and my technical work brain and my fun loving blogger brain take a quick trip to Fist City. One side wants to write and post, and the other side wants to analyze, edit and revise. So I write and write and then I think, oh this is too long, too boring, not funny. The punctuation is horrid. It's riddled with misspellings. Let me get my Strunk and White, I never can remember the lay/lie rules.

I don't just want this to be adequate. I don't just want this to be good. I want it to be great! It's not descriptive enough, there's no imagery. IT'S NOT PERFECT!

So then, the third monster in my brain chimes in like the serpent in the Garden of Eden. He says, "You know what you should probably do instead of posting this imperfect thing? You should probably, just save it. Take a minute, come back with a fresh set of eyes. Let it stew. You'll be much better equipped to edit this later. Besides, you could probably check online for that thing you saw the other day, or organize your closet; it's a wreck."

And then I get all overwhelmed by my desire to bring you great, perfect, humorous, interesting, well-written content that I give in. I convince myself that it's better to post something later because then I'll have more time to make it just right. And then I decide the Christmas decorations need reorganizing or that I can't wait a minute long to whip up a batch of cupcakes.

Well Internet, I'm ready to turn this ship around. I declare today that I will no longer allow Harky Tarky to suffer because of my condition. I am telling you to expect me to post all five unposted posts within the week. I won't let you down.

Oh, I also redesigned this blog template, and those changes too have yet to be implemented, but you'll have to take that up with Josh. That's his department.

In short, POSTS by Rene that are great if not perfect coming soon to a Harky Tarky near you!